Infertile couple love dog as if it was a child. Infertile couple laugh and clap hands. Infertile couple go to TGIF and eat basket of chicken wings.

I don't want to ruin this video for you. Oh wait, I do. I want to ruin it for you I forgot that's what you don't pay me to do.
So hold your breath and die if you don't want to hear the spoiler.
This video has a dog on a swing. Yep! it's a dog on a swing. It's full of a dog swinging while fat humans stand around talking about how much their dog loves to sit in a swing.
This dog is not really the bastard here. This dog wants to be out smelling butts and chasing squirrels and not being forced to do human things. I bet this couple is infertile.

Still Not Human.

Run Ostrage Run

After the judge made her ruling Queeny made his daring jail break. The ostrage proved to be no match for the power of human machinery.
Still Not Human.

Being truly fabulously gay still just for humans

Gordon the pig waited around the "cockpit" all night but nobody approached him. One particularly handsome gay man, named Terry, quipped, "why do gay bars always smell like bacon?"
Gordon took this to mean he wasn't welcomed at the "cockpit" so he left the bar and cried in the alleyway between the "cockpit" and "TGIF".
What Terry actually meant was that he felt like undercover cops frequented the gay bar. Gordon the pig didn't understand this because Gordon the pig was just a pig and didn't understand sarcasm which is a trait truly important to being fabulously gay.
Still Not Human.

Don't eat this dog he has eye brows

People love the random colorfulness of dogs. This dog looks like a real human because he has "eye brows", can you imagine that!
Man he looks just like my friend Vinson if Vinson had a snout face only good for finding slim jims and a dumb tongue that is good for licking butts.
While I'm on the subject I'm <--> (this close) to putting the Japanese on notice. Listen to the laugh track and you'll know what I'm talking about. I don't know what's more annoying the dog with "eye brows" or the Japanese going all crazy.
STILL NOT HUMAN.

It's a CROCK that Gary isn't on Dancing With The Stars

Gary the crocodile has been practicing all year to audition for "Dancing With The Stars" and now that the day has finally come Gary was told that only humans can be on the show!

Now that is crockacist or crockadileist or something. Anyway sign this petition that we will send to "Dancing With The Stars".

Gary is counting on you!

Winner of Still Not Human's first surfing contest

Who won?
After looking at the contestants I'm going to give it to this girl.

This crazy human got attacked by a shark and now only has one arm and she still surfs. Our group of surfer dogs don't stand a chance. Bethany Hamilton proving even human gimps are better than our four legged friends.

Chance of winning: Just did.

IS HUMAN.

Cats are tricking you into loving them.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/8148192.stm

We have a serious problem on our hands. A Scientist has just discovered that Cats use a very distinctive purring sound when they want attention or food. A sound humans can not ignore.

Scientist, Dr Karen McComb, whom is obviously a cat woman, said that the study was inspired by her own Cat, Pepo.

Apparently, Karen hypothesis is that cat's have learned to purr and cry like a baby which makes it very difficult for Karen to ignore Mr. Pepo.

Here is the thing, Karen the scientist, a cat even if they some how learned to mimic the sounds of a baby isn't a baby.

If my cat made a sound that tugged at my heart strings the same way a baby, hungry and wanting attention, did I would get a Catholic Priest. Yep I would get Father OMaley' and we would have ourselves an exorcism.

And if that didn't work I would just assume my cat ate a child. He is a fat bastard.